Theories of Life - Theory 1, chapter 1

Relationships snap shot:

Initial days:

Guy: Good morning sweety, how did you sleep last night?
Gal: yaaaaawn, well, it was ok, but you know what, I had a nightmare!
Guy: ooh…why?
Gal: donno rey!hmm…..
Guy: ooh, don worry sweetu, your day will be real damn good – reads out a poem
Gal: happy – blushing!
Gal: so what’s the plan for the day?
Guy: (discusses)

Afternoon:
Gal: hi ra!
Guy: hi babes.
Gal: what full excited moods. Had a nice day eh?
Guy: with you in my life, how can I ever have a bad day.
Gal: he he, so did you have lunch?
Guy: not yet rey
Gal: what ra, why do you do like this? Have food at the right time, and have it stomach full. Now plz go and have your meal, else I will be sad!
Guy: ok, ok sweety, sorry, will go right away

Evening: Meeting + movie, sweet talks, dinner

Night:
Guy: hey, sweety, had a very nice day today. Thanks for the kiss. I am still floating in that feeling
Gal: (blushing)
Guy: wowww…..sweety, tomorrow, two ok?
Gal: (blushes further, controls it) No wayyy (à implies for sure)
Guy: plzz plzz rey
Gal: No wayyyy….lets see tomorrow (imploies it can be more than two too!)
Guy: ok, sweety, have a goo nite sleep, my darling, my sweetheart…muaaa
Gal: (can’t stop blushing): po ra…good nite
Gal: happy, thinking of days events, blushing, dreamy
Guy: happy too, content, thinking of tomorrow

What’s this all about? Well, it is just an incomplete example of how humans handle relationships, specifically, or how they evolve.

The theory that I shall discuss here would be on a much broader category:

Applications of Law of Diminishing Returns to Human interactions and grouping

We all live our lives, learn scientific knowledge, apply them where ever applicable, fall in love, and break up, again fall in love, make friends, old friends slowly fade from thoughts as we lose contact, nevertheless, we make new friends, feel comfortable, eat, sleep, work, play --- what crap?

Let us get some stuff organized here and for once, let us stop and apply some principles to real life situations.

I am not speaking of applications of Darwin's theory and neither what shall follow is from any text, it was a brain child of certain brain cells in my head which worked day in and day out for years, to see a possible relation, constantly observing, taking notes, and now fairly satisfied, it made a report, a research paper and got ‘em published in 'left half brain cell conference'.

OK, coming to the organizing factor, let us keep it simple,
1) Internal - eat, sleep, play, watch tv etc
2) External - Interacting with friends, love, relationships, work place etc

Now coming to the theory:

We all would have studied or heard of one very famous law in economics,
'The law of diminishing returns'
Well, to put it briefly, the rate of satisfaction on any product/service decreases with increasing rate of consumption.

Have you ever wondered how it applies in our lives?
Yeah, it is pretty obvious in certain cases, and there are exceptions, lesser in percentage to those that go along the lines
of the principle though. It is obvious in all our internal things:

--> eating: If you are hungry and eat your favorite dish, you relish it most, the first time you take it and then you might
go 2 times more, 3,5, but by the time it reaches 4 or higher than that, you start to lose interest, your satisfaction levels are not as high as they were when you took it the first time.

So to put it simply satisfaction during intake 1

Similar is the case for sleeping or watching tv, but our measurement basis would be in hours then.

Now, how about the external factors?

How do you think it applies to friendship, relationships, love, hatred, sex, interactions with people etc?

What I feel is, the law applies here too, just that the time frame and interacting factors are more and different and hence measurement and subsequently observing them could be problematic.

What do I mean by external factors?

Say, in the eating example above, after the first two times you consumed you are given another favorite side-dish. What happens now? the environment of testing has changed and hence it is possible that you are satisfied more for the next one or two times you consume your favorite dish along with your side dish...

So it is possible that satisfaction during intake 1 <> that during intake 3 + side dish < ...

Now answer the following questions: (people who have been in relationships can relate better, I guess) 1) When you meet a new person (make a special note if the person is of opposite sex), and let us also take it for granted that both of you interact well. Then 1.1 How do you classify your initial interactions?

• Exciting
• New world and Nice to be in
• Want to know more of him/her
• Should make an impression at any cost baap
• I should do something so that he/she should develop interest in me.
  and so on....

2) OK, it has been 3-4 months and now you have done what all or most of or some (as you wanted to) of the above: now here we diverge into two things:

2.1 You both have become good friends and are interested in continuing the friendship or have been thinking of a relationship (for opposite sex interactions and given you both are single not considering cases of deceit) - then go back to question 1 and answer again, what do you think these answers would be compared to that of 1.1, more intense, less intense, equal?

2.2 You are not as interested as in him/her as you were before, but will continue to interact based on his/her interest and or your chances of meeting regularly, in that case, don't you think the LAW applied here? Your satisfaction/mental curiosity to know about him/her is quenched and because of the findings, you wish not to know more?

3) What do you say when I ask you to recollect names of your school mates? Your college-mates? You remember only few of those you are not in touch with.

4) How about those who have been in relationships? First 3-6 months Vs feelings/experiences after 1-2 years, 4-5 years? Don’t you think things have changed? That it is not that initial excitement and love he/she showed? Well, remember, your partner too might be feeling the same.

So, does the theory apply? How, what are the controlling factors? How to uncork it so that you sustain your relationships, friendship longer and more satisfying???

-------------------------!!!HOW DOES THE ThEoRy work, coming soon!!!.------------------